"The art of
conversation lies in listening." - Malcolm Forbes.
Marriage is such a gift that society has blown off. It is
normal to see spouses being unfaithful and not respecting one another, but more
than that, is the lack of connection because there is no communication.
Communication is an art form that enhances relationships and improves lives.
There are strategies you can learn to improve your communication skills, such
as working on your listening skills. Listening more than we speak is hard
because we want to be heard. You may even feel that what you have to say is
more important than what your spouse has to say. To see major improvement in
your communication, you must listen more to what the other person is saying. There
is a quote by Epictetus that explains it well, "We have two ears and one
mouth so that we can listen twice as much as we speak."
Another tip would be to maintain good eye contact with your
spouse to reassure them that they have your undivided attention. Learn to read between
the lines of what is being said and what they mean. "The most important
thing in communication is to hear what isn’t being said.", a quote by
Peter Drucker’s that explains the value of understanding hidden messages and
recognizing them through your spouse’s words. In learning to read your spouse,
you can show them support and understand how to meet their needs. Then, you can
start to show them empathy. When you show your spouse empathy, you let them
know that you care, and you are attentive to them. Also, try to avoid
distractions when you are speaking. You should create times throughout your day
where you can speak to your spouse alone. No kids, no phone, no interruptions.
Listening will transform not only your marriage, but also
other relationships you have. Your spouse wants to feel heard and understood,
so begin transforming your communication with listening. Your marriage will be stronger,
and you will learn more about your spouse along the way!
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